Why don't you pick up a teddy bear to go with your feeling of despair

I have to fill about 30 positions by Friday so I've been spending my days interviewing people and reading resumes and sometimes I come across some funny things. Here are two:

1.) I guy put down that he use to work at the LA County Coroners Office...in the gift shop. Exactly who would be looking to buy a gift at the coroner's office? "I'm sorry that you had to come down to identify the remains of your murdered husband but would you like to buy a commemorative shot glass while you're here?"

2.) FYI: You should never send a picture with a resume. It says more about your ego than you would want a prospective employer to know. But I love it when people send pictures because I know right away that I don't need to call them, and it also gives me a good laugh, because I have yet to see an even remotely professional looking picture. Like today - a girl sent in her resume and attached a picture to it of her in a lacy red lingerie top with a whole lot of cleavage. I showed it to Chiquita and she asked, "Is she applying for the streetwalker position?"