Roaming Gangs of Chickens

My car was FILTHY so I was planning on washing it tomorrow. But then at lunch today I decided to stroll around CostPlus World Market and when I came out it looked like a flock of birds had their way with my car. I'm blaming the gang of chickens I see occasionally roaming the streets of San Dimas. I wonder if these chickens are as tough as the gang of chickens that roams the streets of Chino. My money, of course, is on the Chino chickens. They are in the numbered streets, after all. And everyone knows that chickens and people who come from the numbered streets are hard core. (Who is secretly hoping that I one day write a musical called West-Side Chickens?)

But, back to my car. So it was officially gross and I couldn't wait until tomorrow so I had it washed. Which is a huge splurge for me. This is actually only the second time I've ever paid someone else to wash my car (okay, well, I use to pay Casey sometimes when he was a kid). I hate paying money to have my car washed. Even though they do a lovely job and they wash the outside AND the inside of my windows. But whatever, it needed to be done. And it looks so shiny and pretty and I feel much better about life in a shiny, pretty car. Or I would if I didn't have to drive with all the windows down. Remember how Medusa's snake-hair looked like in Clash of the Titans? That's how my hair looks with all the windows down. But it can not be helped because the smell...oh, the smell. I needed just a little air freshener because after the rain last weekend my car was smelling a little musty. So I said, "Just a little bit of air freshener." But he may not have understood, or written it down, or cared. Because I watched the guy spray half a bottle onto my floor mats. And now my car smells like a cherry cough syrup factory. And I didn't even ask for cherry.

And you know how I am with smells. How I get unscented everything. How I have a hard time sitting through Relief Society because there is too much perfume. How I can smell people's deodorant from across the room. My throat is starting to close up just thinking about it.

So, for those of you who actually have this done regularly, how long is it going to take my car to cleanse itself of the smell? Is there anything I can put on it to counteract it? Will I have Medusa hair for weeks?

(If you don't have any answers for these pressing questions you can take a Pop Quiz: This post makes me think of two Seinfeld episodes. Can you guess which ones?)