Wednesday, March 23, 2011

This post brought to you by the show Hoarders

I am blessed to live in a wee small apartment.  Blessed because I only have so much room to put things.  If I had more space I would have more stuff because that's just my nature.  But every so often I'll catch a few minutes of that show Hoarders and suddenly I'll get it into my head that I need to throw everything I own into the trash because I CANNOT END UP LIKE THAT! 

(Side note:  have you seen Animal Hoarders.  KNIGHTS OF COLUMBUS!!  And also EGADS!  I actually can't watch it.  Because I already think that cats will eat my face when I sleep.  So I start to hyperventilate when I see the title, "Person living with 42 cats.") 

So tonight I attacked the upper quadrant of my closet and I got rid of so much stuff.  I love to look at something and decide that I don't need it anymore.  Let freedom ring!

But here's a brief list of things that I found that survived the purge.

1.)  My Best of Dolly Parton CD, which I am listening to right this very minute.  I contest that Jolene is one of the greatest songs ever written.  And not just because it's fun to sing along to but because I like to imagine that if Jolene did actually try to take Dolly's man and they got into a scuffle over it that Dolly would be the hands-down winner.  I'm sure even Jolene is smart enough to know you don't mess with a woman with hair like that. 

2.)  My sophomore yearbook.  Speaking of hair, what were we thinking?  Oh, the hours we spent on our bangs.

3.)  This picture of me and Amanda in front of a giant chicken. 

I will report that there is a very similar picture of the two of us wearing those glasses on the Grassy Knoll.  In fact, there are dozens of pictures of us in those glasses all over the greater Dallas/Fort Worth area.  It was a trip that involved, among other things, the attempted theft of a fallen highway sign, Gina threatening to punch a tollbooth lady in the face, and the Greatest Meal of My Life.  It was a pretty great weekend.  And just so you know, if I'm given the opportunity to wear funny glasses and take a picture in front of a giant chicken, I'll do it every single time.

Tomorrow I tackle the lower quadrant of the closet and, if I survive that, under my bed.  Oh the treasures that await.


Laura said...

I have SO many comment about this post.

First, it is 5:51 am and I am sitting in my office laughing out loud over the picture of you and Amanda at Babe's and your description of that crazy weekend! I was pretty much mortified by those glasses and how they showed up at sometimes the most inappropriate moments (grassy knoll). I was also mortified at the attempted theft of the fallen highway sign. was also probably the only thing that got me through and I will be forever grateful for friends who wouldn't let me drown.

Oh, and one of the other fun moments of that weekend that I remember was getting about 42 pounds of sugary snacks (including a tube of raw chocolate chip cookie dough) and playing games in the hotel room.

Second, I do watch Hoarders and it is disturbing on so many levels, but also extremely fascinating. I am the opposite of a hoarder, an anti-hoarder,if you will, so it really boggles my mind why people can't let go of things. Just hearing you describe your closet cleaning gave me a little lift. Isn't it a wonderful feeling?

Valerie said...

I also think that Jolene is an amazing song. I had it on a running mix for a while, and it is dynamite to run to. I just kind of love D. P. She's just exactly who she is, and not because she's trying to brand herself or whatever, she just is. It's refreshing. And don't even get me started on Steel Magnolias.

Chris said...

So, what was the greatest meal of your life?

Amanda said...

What a great weekend! It was so fun to be hanging together as girls!!! Chris, if you love Gina, get her to Texas and take her to Babe's!!!! It is the stuff that dreams are made of! I have some wonderful friends here in WI, but no one that would wear those glasses with me. Love you girl!! And Laura, for the record, I don't think that we wore those in any inappropriate places. How could there be such a thing? :)

Rach said...

I have never watched hoarders. I can't do it. I saw an episode of Bones where they discover someone buried in their stuff, and that was so creepy I can't even think about watching a show about it. I am going to get on itunes after I type this and listen to Jolene, because I'm not sure that I've ever heard it. (shock and awe, I know) Texas really is full of good times. And good food.

teresa p said...

The Dolly Parton/Jack White duet of Jolene is the best. Seriously one of my favorite songs ever.

I can't watch Hoarders, either. I already feel sufficiently depressed about the messiness of my house, thank you very much.

Just finished Ella Minnow Pea. Great book!

Bronwyn James said...

I'm now feeling the urge to throw things away. It's not a great time in my life to do that as I was only allowed to bring to the U.S. things I knew I would need this year. Maybe a neighbor has things I could throw away. You keep up the good fight though, and keep posting treasure pictures.

colleeeen said...

You know, I never spent much time on my bangs. Ridiculous haircolors and preposterous makeup? Oh yes.

Anonymous said...

You realize that without a picture of The Fringe the story is incomplete, and I cannot obtain closure... *new photoshop project*...