Lindsay, Camille and I spent the morning strolling around your park today. It was lovely. It would have been nice to know that it was "Screaming 13 Year Old Girls Who Dress Alike and Walk in Packs Day" but whatever, they made Star Tours hilarious. We decided to do things that we rarely do, like hang out on The Island Formally Known As Tom Sawyer's But Is Now Moderately Pirate Themed (Lame). I mean the pirate theme is lame. The island is great. There's a tree house and swaying bridges - how can it not be great. And we rode Casey Jr.'s Train which, I have to admit, is kind of magical in that you're just cruising along and you're slightly higher than everyone else so you can wave to the people down below which makes you feel regal and benevolent.
We decided to check out Innoventions because none of us had ever been inside - mostly because it sounded kind of boring. It has all these newfangled things of the future and if I were impressed by technology then I would be on board. But I'm 80 and not really into what the kids are into so, you know. It was mostly a cool (as in - out of the heat) place to walk around while we digested our pretzels to make room for the ice cream cones we were about to eat. But here's my beef: in the opening video it showed how Innoventions has always been a place to show off new ideas for the future - one of which was the jet pack. And the video was a bit condescending. As in, "Can you believe we all thought we would have jet packs?" And inside, near the exit they have the old spaceman mannequin with the jet pack on - as a relic of our foolish past.
Well, I'm here to tell you, Disneyland, that I don't know what your future looks like, by MY future has a jet pack. Because if there aren't jet packs, then what else is there to hope for?!