There are a few things I could write about. Such as:
1.) How I ended up as a judge of a couple of high school debates on abortion and how teenagers acting serious is one of my favorite things to watch;
2.) How lately I've been running into people I haven't seen in years and years and I have almost the exact same conversation with them: "Are you married?" "No." "Oh. You look SO GREAT!" This makes me think that I either I need to a.) put people on a rotation to be cut out of my life for several years or b.) never get married because who doesn't love being told you look SO GREAT! Especially considering the tragic tumbleweedy state of my hair on several of these occasions.
3.) Parents who take their children to movies they will be bored with and then let them run up and down the stairs like maniacs only to scream at them for acting like maniacs.
4.) How I went to a free Pat Benitar concert last night but left before she actually got up on stage because I'm 80 and can't handle sweaty, dirty crowds.
But instead of those things I will tell you about the deep, dark conspiracy to deny me a chocolate shake. Oh, there is a conspiracy and I will not rest until I find who is behind it.
Katie and I were coming home from the movies tonight when we both were overcome with the need for a chocolate shake. So we drove out of our way to get one, only to be told at the drive thru that they were out of ice cream. We were disappointed but not deterred and we drove to another place. Only to be told, again, that they were out of ice cream! And this time we had to suffer the indignity of sitting in the drive thru until the car ahead of us was done. The guy at the window felt bad and offered us free sodas, which was nice and all but it just showed his ignorance. What is a soda to a chocolate shake? He could have offered us a handful of those little salt packets - it would have had the same appeal. We could have just gone across the street to the store to get ice cream and make our own shakes but we decided instead to go home and wallow in our bitterness. Because nothing tastes as good as righteous indignation.
Wait, that's a lie. A chocolate shake would taste better.