Thursday, June 30, 2011

A Cautionary Tale

If you've been in my car you have probably met Ruby St. Germaine - Former lounge singer and fallen woman.  She's a little doll who used to sit on my dash board, underneath the wee disco ball that hangs from my rear view mirror but through a series of tragic events she has ended up in my cup holder - bitter and burned out.  A cautionary tale of the seedier side of show business.

Life in the cup holder has not been good to her.  Her hair is mussed, her dress is fraying, she has lost her microphone (although has still held on to her jewelry).  And her face looks like she's had more than one hot chocolate spill on her.  She's a tough cookie, but today I saw how bad things have gotten.  This morning I ate my breakfast in the car on my way to work and I left my spoon in the cup holder with Ruby.  This is what I found when I got back in:

Rudy is holding the spoon which has some sort of white substance on it.  This can only mean one thing:  heroin. 

Ruby, nooooooooooo!!!!!!  You have so much to live for!  Looks like someone is going to rehab.


Camille said...

Ruby...NOOOOOOOOO! Don't do it.

Words can't even describe how much I love this post. I would still pay to see Ruby in concert.

Stephanie said...

Does she have the telltale track marks in between her toes? Or is she just covering up for her loser roommate? I think an intervention is required in either case. She's not a lost cause . . . don't give up, Ruby!

Valerie said...

It happens to the best of them. I had a dashboard hulu man once who stayed too long at the exploitation of Polynesian culture party, and self destructed. Then one day, he was just gone.

I haven't heard from him since.

Taryn said...

This picture is a bit freaky! I am a little scared that she is going to come to life and twist her head around. YIKES!

Rach said...

Oh Ruby. Life will get better. Really it will. Just look at Liza Minelli. Wait, don't. Things will pick up. Maybe a wedding gig will come along, but you must be sober or they will fire you.

Anonymous said...

That's really bizarre that in the last post I read, I made some comment about heroin. Not least because it was 3 minutes ago. She's like book 5 Rita Skeeter.