Wednesday, March 7, 2012

A brief conversation between me and Costco

Me: Gah! I feel like at any moment all those pallets of potato chips are going to come crashing down on me! How come the only soda you sell in a 2 liter bottle is Coke?!  How come you don't have signs on your aisles??!  Am I just suppsed to guess where everything is?  How come there are no workers around to ask a simple question like where are the other beverages besides Coke?!  Why can't I pay for these 8 pizzas with my Costco card?!  Are you serious that it's cash only?! Who carries around $90 in cash?!  Is that a five gallon vat of mayonnaise?  DO PEOPLE ACTUALLY BUY THAT MUCH MAYONNAISE?!  Are you in cahoots with Wal-mart? Because I thought that Wal-mart was Satan's store but now I think you may be making a play for that title.

Costco: Are you talking to me, loser?

4 comments:

Andrea said...

I sometimes get annoyed with Costco too, but they always reel me in again when they sell all the BBC movies that I love for great prices. You should hear my sister's stories about Costco. She's gotten her hand slapped twice by two different sample workers because she took from the wrong tray. It was hilarious!

Rach said...

Rachel, I know why there are no signs on the aisles. The employees like to rearrange the store in order to create their own entertainment. I'm pretty sure they were hiding behind the stacks, watching me as a wove in and out of the aisles for 15 minutes the other night looking for the diapers and wipes. I finally tracked one of them down and they had moved them to the other end of the store, half a mile away. So that's why. And I'm pretty sure the demon that lives under Walmart and sucks the life out of shoppers has a twin that lives under Costco. But the deals on movies and books and produce keep me coming back. That and the fact that I can buy a bag of chocolate chips the size of my baby.

regular grandma said...

Here is the secret, when you buy the Soda, pay for the pizzas at the register. Then all you have to do is pick them up.
( I love your blog, your mom said I could read it)

Empress of Venus said...

Quote I read only moments ago on Twitter: "My wife just bought toilet paper from Costco, which is good because later tonight we're having 3,000 people over at our house to poop."