Saturday, May 10, 2008

Open Letter to Me

Dear Rachel,

You are an 80 year old woman and because dementia has set in I would like to remind you that 80 year olds do not stay out until 1:30 in the morning gabbing with the ladies. You were cut out for that sort of thing way back when you were 25 but now that you're in the sunset of your life you should be making wiser choices. Choices that would allow you to get 7 hours of sleep. Choices that don't give you puffy eyes and an even manlier morning-man-voice. Especially now when you know you always automatically wake up at 7. On the dot. Every morning. No alarm needed. No matter how little sleep you have gotten. It stinks being 80.

Love, Rachel

P.S. You're hair looks surprising good today. Did you switch shampoos?
P.S. 2 You should have oatmeal for breakfast. Trust me.
P.S. 3 I actually think it may have been a little worth it to stay up late, only because 1.) you got to watch North and South and 2.) you got to hear someone coin the term, "cesspool loins" which you would not have heard had you left at midnight.

1 comment:

themayerfamily said...

Oh the pains of getting older--I hear you. Did you switch shampoos? I can't wait to hear the story of the new term. And, even though I know it hurts, it sounds like it was for a very worth cause--North and South is a staple in my video collection too!