Friday, October 14, 2011

Modelland, gross hair, cream puffs and surviving consumption

1.)  I've survived the consumption.  Although I've had a bit of a relapse last night and today.  Because yesterday I had a burst of energy after holing up in my apartment and watching countless hours of Gilmore Girls (what else is a girl to do in such a weakened condition). I ended up cleaning my bathroom, vacuuming, dusting, cleaning the kitchen, including moping the floor, shopping for fabric, shopping for groceries, visiting my mom, making a Halloween costume for a friend, making cream puffs and hosting book club.  By the time the ladies left last night it hit me that I was nigh unto death and I was in bed within 10 minutes.  A record.  But book club is always worth it. 

2.)  If you're going to have a book club you should read the Wednesday Wars.  And not just because it's a great book.  But also because cream puffs play a dominant part in it.  Which means that when your friends come over for book club they'll bring an assortment of cream puffs.  We had 4 different kinds.  You cannot beat that.

3.)  Stacy convinced me to try not shampooing my hair.  As in, get it wet and condition it and rinse it out, just don't shampoo.  She's been doing it (or rather, not doing it) for a few weeks now and claims her hair has become luxurious.  And truly, it looked that way when we Skyped on Sunday.  So I gave it a shot this morning.  EPIC FAIL.  When my hair dried it looked like I had soaked it in left over cooking oil and then styled it with lard.  And then it hit me - I already have decent hair, minus the tumbleweediness and robust cowlicks.  Why change anything?  Shampoo it is.

4.)  I finished Modelland.  It is the crappiest book I've ever read in my entire life.  Holy Cats in a Bag, it is so bad.  If I didn't love Tyra and her loony ways it would have been a nightmare for me.  I wouldn't have made it past page 20.  It is so bedazzled with descriptions of the craziest things - things I can't even recount or describe because there were so, so, so many. There were several moments (ok, every page) that I thought, "Is this even a book?  Or did Tyra's brain just vomit all over these pages?"  Which is to say, it was awesome.  I will be hosting a dramatic reading from it in a few weeks.  You are all invited and must come prepared to smize.


Rach said...

I wonder how many holds there are on Modelland at my library. I'd better get on the list.

James Best said...

I will personally fund a touring show of you reading from that book.

Hi, Rachel. I totally blurk and I'm coming out of the internet bushes. How about that?

So yeah. Tour show. I want a jazz trio behind you. I want you to sit on a high stool and drink ginger ales. With bitters.