Dear People Who Have to Be Around Me Today,
It's Monday, alright? I don't normally work on Mondays. I have a cold and I didn't sleep well and my left ear is so clogged up that I'm pretty sure Katie stuffed a sock in it as a joke last night (Why would you do that Katie? Why?!), and the homeopathic stuff that Doc had me put in my netty pot makes my sinus cavity feel like the Fiery Pits of Hell have relocated up there, or at least the boys locker room from the Fiery Pits of Hell, because that's what it smells like, and because I have to put it in my nose that's all I can smell and I'm not sure if I'm just smelling it in my nose or if I actually smell like it. And on top of all of this I have to work 12.5 hours today so maybe I'm just not prepared to look pretty or be chipper and maybe you should just back off and bring me a cookie. That would be a real big help.
Sorry about the smell,