Dear People Who Have to Be Around Me Today,
It's Monday, alright? I don't normally work on Mondays. I have a cold and I didn't sleep well and my left ear is so clogged up that I'm pretty sure Katie stuffed a sock in it as a joke last night (Why would you do that Katie? Why?!), and the homeopathic stuff that Doc had me put in my netty pot makes my sinus cavity feel like the Fiery Pits of Hell have relocated up there, or at least the boys locker room from the Fiery Pits of Hell, because that's what it smells like, and because I have to put it in my nose that's all I can smell and I'm not sure if I'm just smelling it in my nose or if I actually smell like it. And on top of all of this I have to work 12.5 hours today so maybe I'm just not prepared to look pretty or be chipper and maybe you should just back off and bring me a cookie. That would be a real big help.
Sorry about the smell,
Rachel
4 comments:
'Tis the season, Rachel. So sorry. By the way, I hope you get this homeopathic smelly stuff for free. If it makes you smell like the boys' locker room from the Fiery Pits of Hell, it should at least be free. I guess if someone came up and said, "What is that SMELL?" you could answer, "Why, it's this wonderful witch doctor medicine, and you can get it from my lovely doctor." Free advertising for Doc. Maybe that's why it stinks so bad. Get better, Rachel.
I hope you get better before Santa comes - if not, maybe you could ask him to bring you a new nose? This time of year is rough on noses.
My last experience with Chinese medicine was with Bronwyn's mom. She gave me this powder stuff that I was supposed to swallow. I put it all in my mouth and have a glass of water. Her son chimes in that I'm not supposed to drink the water, so I thought that I was supposed to swallow first and then drink the water. I ended up with this lump of dirt in the back of my throat. So, I start coughing and then it all ends up in my nose. I WAS supposed to swallow it with the water. Maybe he didn't like me that much??? Hmmm. Anyway, then I had all this crap in my nose, so I had to snort water up my nose to rinse it out. Now THAT was lovely. And for a girl who would never dream of using nasal spray, it was gross. But it was better than the burning fury in my nose!
Any time I'm sick around Chris, she tries to convince me to take something for it and all I have to do is remind her of that time. I'll take a Sudafed and sleep it off. Even if that Chinese crap works better.
I've been wondering why my apartment smells like a boys locker room in the fiery depths of hell--it is seeping up through the floor-boards! I simply thought you had made a late night deal with the devil. . .
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