Wednesday, July 21, 2010

A bunch of stuff that will fascinate you

There are a few questions in this post. Feel free to answer some or all of them. Or you can just say, with attitude of course, "Whatever! I'm on summer vacation."

1.) I'm sending Flat Rachel to New York to visit Valerie. Because she asked. And also because I can't find the slips of paper with all your names on them to throw into the sombrero and I just don't feel much like making new ones. Watch out, Val. She will eat all your ice cream in the middle of the night and then blame it on the dog. Even when you don't have one.

Question: If you could send the flat version of yourself anywhere in the world, where would it be?

2.) Every time I watch So You Think You Can Dance I want to cut my hair short like Mia Michaels. But you must PROMISE ME that you will not let me. There is only Woe and Despair and free room and board at the Home for the Sad and Tragic when I cut my hair short.

Question: Have you ever cut your hair short? Did you love it or hate it? Will you promise to save me and my hair from myself if I threaten to attempt it?

3.) Gina and Chris are in town so we all went to Disneyland on Monday. We had a discussion about how when you're at Disneyland it's perfectly acceptable to wave to complete strangers for no reason at all - something you would never do outside in the real world. But there's something about seeing people while you're on a ride that makes you want to wave to everyone. Like, "Look at me! I'm having fun! Let's be friends! And by the way you shouldn't being wearing socks with those sandals, you rube!" So we found ourselves on Casey Jr. and we were waving to the people riding the Storybook boats down below when suddenly this rather hairy man starts blowing kisses at me. And every time we would cross paths, which was often as the rides circle around each other, he would spot me and blow kisses in a rather exaggerated fashion. Waving to strangers can get you a boyfriend! But alas, we were not meant to be. He wasn't waiting for me when I got off the train which makes me think that he's probably a jerk who chews with his mouth open and is mean to his mother. Boy, did I dodge that bullet.

Question: What is your favorite ride at Disneyland?

4.) I just got my itinerary to Tunis. LA to Minneapolis/St. Paul to New York to Montreal to Paris to Tunis. That's 5 opportunities to sip ginger ale while trying to avoid awkward small talk with my neighbor. I am so bad at airplane small talk. It's the combination of the tight quarters and the common destination that makes me think that we're now best friends so I instantly start off with a sarcastic joke, such as, "Did you notice our pilot's glass eye?" and suddenly they're buzzing for the stewardess to bring them a stiff drink. Although I have found that this strategy either stifles further awkward small talk for the remainder of the flight or reveals a kindred spirit who will pull out the crayons when you suggest making hand puppets out of your barf bags.

Question: What is your favorite airplane beverage?


Bronwyn James said...

I think I would send Flat Bronwyn to New Zealand.

I cut my hair boy-short when I was 10 years old and it SCARRED ME FOR LIFE. I will never do it again, even though it is a much more plausible hair cut for a grown woman. Ever.

I'd have to say Space Mountain because it is the only ride I remember the name of. It's been a few years.

Ginger Ale. Hands down.

Angela Noelle of Striking Keys said...

I cut my hair "Dharma from Dharma and Greg short" when I was in high school. It seemed okay then...but Haki is not too impressed by "historical shots" of that time.

P.S. Bronwyn is wise. /cough cough NEW ZEALAND!

Stephanie said...

Flat Stephanie would like to go to the bottom of the Grand Canyon. Hopefully with full-figured but better-in-shape Stephanie in a couple of years.

Never cut my hair THAT short although I constantly waffle between short bob and little longer layered bob.

I love any ride I can ride with my daughter. She makes everything more fun.

I love a good gingerale (with lime if they have it) but sugar is not so good for me right now. I usually stick with water because planes always leave me a little dehydrated.

Rach said...

Flat Rac would love to see New Zealand or Ireland. Both green and beautiful with cool accents.

I got a "Dorothy Hammel" cut in fifth grade that was done by a student at a beauty school. I got mistaken for a boy in front of my entire school at an assembly, so that cut will never ever happen again. My rule is chin or below.

I haven't been to Disneyland for a very long time, but I remember loving Splash mountain and Space mountain.

When they have it, my fave drink is Minute Maid fruit punch. Tasty! When they don't, I have Sprite, but it gives me the burps and then I feel gross.

Andrea said...

Flat Andrea has always wanted to go to New York, so she's jealous of you.

I cut my hair really short in my senior year and it didn't look too bad but I wish I had waited until after graduation, my graduation cap looked horrible with no hair underneath.

How can I choose just one favorite ride at Disneyland? Pirates, Haunted Mansion, Indiana Jones, Splash Mountain, I love them all. Maybe except for Nemo, I prefer the old submarine ride, the one where the mermaids wave at you.

Now when I fly I get a cran-apple and Andrew gets a gingerale. This way we share and have our own version of "Mormon punch". Here's hoping you don't get stuck next to someone who orders tomato juice and snacks on corn nuts. That happened to me and I think I'm still trying to get the stink off of me from it.

Anonymous said...

1. I would send Flat FabuLeslie to the Pyramids, because I have always wanted to see them. I would have her try to fit between the bricks in an effort to get more information for the scientists to figure out how they were made.

2. Your haircut question gives me flashbacks, so I can only answer in short, grammatically incorrect sentences. Fourth grade. Chubby girl. Naturally curly hair. Princess Di cut from a "barber" who had no clue this was ill-advised. Square-dancing in gym class. Regular-dance-partner, Derek Igo refused to dance with me. I looked like a boy. He didn't say it but I KNOW that's why. Tears and tears and tears for days.

I can't go on with these questions now. The flashbacks are too strong.

camille said...

I have the funniest sister! Really, I do. Because you totally would make the glass-eye comment to a stranger. I was kind of laughing really hard when I read that at work and it's just awkward when a co-worker catches you laughing at the computer screen.

I choose to just answer one question: Favorite ride is Thunder Mountain. But it's the best when you can get a seat by your self because on all of the turns your whole body slides over the bench and you flail your arms all over the place. It's fantastic.

Laura said...

I would send my flat self to the Greek Isles, I think. Or maybe back to Italy.

I had short hair on an off my entire childhood. Mostly because I was fighting so desperately to somehow lose the naturaly curly thing. My worst haircut, I think was probably 7th or 8th grade...a little mullet-ish. Not cute!

I have lots of favorite rides at Disneyland too. I do enjoy Space Mountain and Indiana Jones, but I also love Pirates, Small World and Mr. Toad.

I usually just get water on airplanes. But that depends entirely on the location of my seat. If I'm on an aisle, I am much more likely to have a beverage. If I'm on the inside, I'll drink, have to use the restroom and will sit there for half the flight debating on if I can hold it, or if I should make the aisle person get up for me. Awkward.

How long does this 5 part flight actually take?

Rachel said...

24 hours from the time I leave LA to the time I get into Tunis. I leave at 12:45 am on Sept. 1 and get in at 9:15 am on Sept 2. there will be lots and lots of drugs to help me sleep.

Laura said...

It's all about the drugs! I'm not sure if you're talking prescriptions or not...but if so, I highly recommend Ambien. Yes, that's the same drug that inspired some of my nuttiest blog posts a couple of years ago...but it has saved me from many sleepless nights!

Mariah said...

I have a friend in Saudi Arabia, I would sent Flat Mariah there. And make sure they made her her own burka.

I had short hair in high school for just over a year when I was around 14. Like, 2-4 inches short. I would cut it myself. I loved it. And I love the photos of me from then. But I don't know that I could pull it off now. If I was to try I would definitely go to a stylist/hairdresser/salon.

I've been to Disneyland once. I don't remember it well. My favourite thing was all the street performers.

I best like water on the plane. Doesn't everything else cost? I'm in to free.

Valerie said...

I drink ginger ale. Exclusively.